Skip to content


Living with a vegetarian has made me realise that vegetarians are regarded by food vendors as lepers. That famous advert for gloablisation, McDonalds, has just changed its menu to include lots of items with ‘fresh’ salad. It’s good to discover that all those Big Macs I’ve previously devoured have been riddled with salad of the unfresh variety (wot, no slugs?). Anyway, part of the change includes an all new Quorn Premiere. But, rather than think, hey, veggies might want a bit of choice, they’ve removed the Veggie Deluxe from the menu. What is it that makes McDs think that, oh, meat eaters are quite keen to try all kinds of combinations of the appetite-appeasing crap we peddle but vegetarians will be happy with one thin slab of Quorn and nothing else? It’s the smallest burger you could buy. Vegetarians they may be, but that doesn’t mean they don’t like eating ’til the hunger pains actually susbide. Oh, and the gormless staff member couldn’t pronounce Quorn. We made the mistake of eating at the West Yorkshire Playhouse the other night and both opted for the V-friendly stuffed capsicums. It looked very nice behind the glass counter but, we were to find out, vegetarians don’t actually like their food to come with any sauces like those offered as part of every other dish. One stuffed capsicum, a mound of new potatoes and a smattering of broccoli and not a sign of anything that would have allowed it to travel down the trachea with a bit more ease. And this stuff happens all the time. Restaurants have really crap veggie options, if any at all, and the presentation of the food sucks, big time. Maybe this rant shouldn’t be shouted by a meat eater, but it’s really beginning to bug me. How M puts up with it without shouting is beyond me. Peddlers of western food really have a long way to go.

Retail therapy really is great. The Simpsons complete series 3 on DVD now sits beside the TV awaiting our attention, while a new pair of jeans are just crying out for me to step inside them. Yeah, I had to pay extra for jeans that make this kind of crying sound, but fashion does come at a price. I really went out to get some new clobber for the one-man show, but there was nothing suitable. M thinks a Tom Wolfe-style white suit might create the right kind of impression with drunken lit-fest goers.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *